2.5 Brains

Josh's Really Really Smart Movies

Hook

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2. 5 Brains

Hook…sheesh

What can I say? It’s probably in your top 10 favorite films,ya?

After sludging my way through this movie I looked at my notebook to see what “haha funny” things I had noticed about the film. Circled was “Who really rules Neverland-Look to kid island?”

I restarted the film where Peter arrives at kid island. Peter is an immediate target of harassment being that he is obviously an ugly grownup.(Buddy, I feel ya there, oofa)

It seems Ruffalin is in charge of kid island because he is closest to puberty and controls Excalibur. No one seems to be challenging his rule I imagine because he has a golden sword and they only have goop-tipped arrows.

Wayne always says “Don’t Bring Goop Arrows to a Sword Fight” and I finally figured out why.

“So who rules Neverland?” You ask.

Come with me to the scene where Peter has been cornered and Ruffalin pulls out his sword. Here we see Ruffalin almost chop Peter in half (vertically) but stop short. Why? Not because the children around him shouldn’t be exposed to such a horrific act, but because he needs approval. Ruffalin doesn’t rule Neverland or kid island.

Enter the actual leader of Neverland, a small African-Neverlandian child. He grabs Peter’s face, I assumed it was to remove his spine ie; Mortal Kombat Finish Him, but caresses it. He “mushes” it in a way that I imagine the prisoner on “Scared Straight” would have mushed that one white kid’s face if given the chance.

After a good mushin he stretches Peters face backwards and whispers “Oh, There you are.” - Pardon?

This made me immediately burst out in a good laugh. Sheesh..What did Peter look like as a kid?

So I did some searching and made some calls.I found an original poster. showing young Peter that was denied by Disney executives. Enjoy.

2.5Brains

Josh's Really Really Smart Movies

You’ve Got Mail

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2.5 Brains

This movie explores how two adults handle anonymity in the mature themed DZ Discovery Zone that we now currently call “The Internet.”

You see…The internet was a new and scary place in the 90’s and this kept many people away, but not me….

To connect to this mystery land, known as “the internet,” customers had to own a device called a modem. Think of a modem as a “Stargate” (watch the movie, dumdum), opening a portal to another land. However, to open this portal, modems didn’t arrange hieroglyphics on a large, rotating ring..nahh, instead modems would play an arrangement of sounds, each different from the sound before, on what can only be described as an internally installed devil’s flute.

The sounds emitted had no known way of being muffled. This reviewer remembers piling blankets, pillows, and quilts around and on top of his parents modem hoping to stifle the demonic communica in its place.

However, any insulating properties once held by the cottons, polyesters, and wool vanished immediately upon the first note. The circus of sounds played even louder but this time in such a braggadocious manner as to say “na ah ah, na ah ah.”

An AOL commercial with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan secretly cheating on their partners sounds great on paper..but on film..it’s still kinda wrong..yeah?

Great seeing Dave Chappelle though.

2.5 Brains