3.5 brains

Josh's Really Really Smart Movies

The Wizard


3. 5 Brains

This was not as I remember it. Like not at all.

We open with what looks like the desert scene from “Mac & Me.” A long empty highway with a lone boy walking down it. This boy has covered so much distance WALKING they need planes to catch up to him..IM SORRY, WHAT!?

The plane sees him and gives his coordinates to the STATE TROOPER…lol..not the town cop, not the county Sheriff, a State Trooper. lolol

State Trooper pulls up to the boy and shouts “SON!..SON!..” then radios back “Yeah, that’s him” .. -Pardon? Are there a lot of other stray boys wondering highways in this region?


VISION BRAND CLOTHING & NINTENDO got together to shoot a cool kids commercial with Fred Savage and Christian Slater. At the shoot—Fred Savage said it should be actually feature length movie. And instead of kids at a BBQ, it should be about and kid who watched his twin sister drown in a river “but not get pulled down river, instead drown right there 3ft in front of him” (a quote from the movie.)

This traumatized kid has to walk, stack stuff, or play video games to heal his brain. VISION and Nintendo agreed instantly because tthis sounded really SSIIIIICCCKKKK!!

My Review. 3.5 brains

Why?: There is a scene in this movie that is like “Groundhog Day” to me. I lived and re-lived it everyday in middle school. Here is the scene.

The first round of competition has just ended. The Coolest of Cool kids “Lucas” is advancing to the next round but- is not happy to see “Jimmy” advance to the next round.

Lucas and his buddies exit the building and the only non-VISION branded shirt wearing, caucasian boy walks up. This boy is me aka “middle school Josh” and he is attempting to talk “cool kid style” to the cool kids once again.

JOSH-”Lucas, Hey Lucas (catching up) Man, That was Great! (enter odd saying that has never been said by a kid my age) Your going to rip their gizzards out!”-

LUCAS-”Yeah,Yeah, Dorklips, make yourself useful and get me a drink”

….This day was repeated in the hallway, in the lunchroom, and after school for years. But I showed them.

Trust Me, I did..BRAD!..I SHOWED YOU & ZACH!